As parents, we want the very best for our children, and we devote a certain amount of time each day to seeing they have what they need. As children of God ourselves, we also feel the heavenly pull to “create something that did not exist before,” as Dieter F. Uchtdorf reminds us. Creation is a godly attribute, and our participation in the arts is pleasing to our Father in Heaven.
The book of Ecclesiastes tells us that to everything there is a season, and we may feel that our endeavors need to wait until our children are older. I certainly felt that way when I began my family, but then I was strongly prompted not to ignore my desire to write. It wasn’t easy, but as I learned to juggle my schedule, I was able to balance motherhood and a stay-at-home career, which proved to be necessary as the economy fluctuated.
Perhaps my experiences can be of use as you seek time to explore your creativity while also raising your family. My thoughts are geared toward writing, but they can be adapted to any artistic endeavor.
Preparing Meals and Snacks
While it’s best to prepare foods from scratch when possible, there are times when that’s just not reasonable or feasible. Simple breakfasts like cold cereal will do in a pinch (there are varieties with less sugar). You can also do cheese, crackers, carrot sticks, and lunch meat for lunch. I do try to prepare “actual dinners,” as my daughter puts it, and I do make breakfast and lunch, but on days when I’m seriously writing, I let mealtimes become more casual. Some ideas:
a. Keep yogurt in your fridge for a quick snack for you or the kids. Yogurt and a banana make a great breakfast, too.
b. Take a loaf of bread and make it into a whole stack of sandwiches. Then slide the sandwiches back into the bread sack. When someone needs a sandwich, they can just grab one out of the fridge.
c. Designate one crisper in your fridge to be a “snack drawer.” Fill it up with apples, cheese sticks, yogurt, etc. When your children want a snack, tell them to go get something out of the “snack drawer.” You can do the same thing in your cupboard. Make a basket with pretzels, raisins, crackers, etc. and have that be the special “snack basket.” You can take sandwich bags, break the packages down into serving sizes, and you’re your children they can have one so they don’t run off with the whole box.
d. Make meals ahead of time and stick them in the freezer.
e. When I buy a large package of meat, I like to cook it all up, divide it, and then freeze it. That way, when I go to use it, I just warm it through instead of having to both defrost and cook it.
f. Make tomorrow’s dinner while you’re making tonight’s. Cover it and put it in the fridge, then just throw it in the oven tomorrow night.
g. Teach your older children how to make sandwiches, warm up soup, prepare drinks, etc. They get a sense of pride in their accomplishments when they are allowed to help make a meal.
These are all things you can either direct from your desk or will help you spend less time in the kitchen, which equals more time at the computer.
Entertaining the Troops
a. There are many questionable streaming services and we need to make careful viewing choices, but there are some wonderful programs that are fun and educational. My kids have learned a lot from shows like CyberChase, Reading Rainbow, Sesame Street, The Magic School Bus, and the like. We also love Veggie Tales, which is based on Bible stories. There’s nothing wrong with turning on the TV and letting your kids watch a positive show while you write—keeping everything in balance, of course.
b. Get some paper and crayons and let your kids “write” a book of their own while you’re working.
c. Ask older children to read to the younger ones.
Simplifying Housework
a. I have to leave my desk and walk around periodically, so while I’m up, I’ll change out the laundry and put in a load of dishes. Usually by the time I’m done doing that, I’ll be ready to get back to work.
b. The happiest children are the ones who feel they are valuable in their homes and who have a sense of purpose. When you teach your children to do chores, you are helping them to feel needed. Of course, keep the chores age-appropriate so they aren’t unfair and don’t become overwhelming, and work alongside the child. As you team up to turn a half-hour job into a ten-minute job (freeing up twenty minutes), you’re also drawing closer together.
c. Reevaluate your thinking about housework. Are there ways you could simplify your routines? Can you put up with toys scattered across the floor for a little while so you can finish your chapter? Is it necessary to have your dishes perfectly stacked all the time? When you’re on a roll with your book, it’s okay to let some things slide until you’re done and catch up later.
Organizing Your Time
a. I like to assign certain tasks to certain days of the week. For instance, while I was a Cub Scout leader, Wednesday was Scout Day. After lunch, I’d sit down and review what I needed to do to prepare for the meeting at 4:30. I wasn’t writing during this time, or grocery shopping, or anything else. After the boys left, I’d look at the next week’s meeting. I’d do ahead-of-time prep work, and I’d put needed items on my shopping list. Then I didn’t have to think about it again until the next Wednesday. When I was a representative for a local direct sales company, Tuesday was my prep day for that. Look at your life – are there tasks you can isolate to one day a week?
b. Create an errand day. I used to run out and do errands several times a week, and I found I was away from home a lot. Now I designate an errand day. This usually coordinates with payday. I’ll pay the bills, and then I’ll go out and do my grocery shopping, trip to the post office, etc. all at once. It makes for about a two or three-hour trip, but it’s better for me to get it done and over with.
In each of these things, seek the guidance of the Spirit. You will be directed to fun activities for your children and ways to delegate and organize. You’ll find that you’re prompted to know when your children need you most and it’s time to put down your project, and you’ll be led in how to meet their needs most effectively. The Lord will bless your sincere desires to serve Him both as a parent and as a light to others by means of your art.
About the Contributor
Tristi Pinkston is the mother of four, the wife of one, the author of one hundred and seventy-five, and the editor of oodles. She serves as the chairman of the board for the Bear Lake Arts Council and participates enthusiastically (if not with utmost skill) in their theatrical productions. She is currently the editor-in-chief for the resource library here on the LDSPMA website. You can learn more about her on her website.
Jeremy Madsen says
I love these suggestions! My prime writing time is in the evening after the kids are in bed. I find it’s easy to fill that whole time with chores: doing the dishes, checking my email, sorting mail, picking up toys. I need to have the discipline to sit down and write FIRST. Then perhaps I do some of those things to unwind before bed or while I’m debriefing the day with my wife. Or they wait until tomorrow.
Shores and meals somehow eventually get done. Novels do NOT “somehow eventually get done.” They take very deliberate, very disciplined effort!
Tristi Pinkston says
Definitely – we have to create time for writing or it will always take the back burner.